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| I'm actually very tired but I can't fall asleep in this hot weather. Two summer seasons in Santa Cruz, where the climate is so temperate even the nice homes don't have A/C, YOU SPOILED ME. Chino Hills is beyond stifling in comparison.
Also, I went to the Barnes and Noble to buy a birthday card tonight and it was fascinating to see women dressed up like Chino Hills is Vegas on a weekend and the cheap happy hour at the gringo-ed sushi chain is bottle service at a hyped Hollywood night club. Euw just euw.
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| OMG UGH MY LIFE RLLY SUX RITE NOWWWWW! ^ I'm actually a little more than halfway serious about this. I did not think adolescent angst would peak at 22. Seriously, being 22/a jobless post grad/faced with the very real possibility of moving back to SoCal/and having a big fatty question mark of a near-future life plan SUCKS SUCKS SUCKS. I know God, patience and trust are not my strong points. I don't doubt my life will eventually get figured out, but I kind of have this impending deadline for some major aspects of life (aka a decent job) to, I don't know, happen already. But I'm hopeful, I'm just saying optimism and feeling the utter suck ass-ness of the same situation are not mutually exclusive. I just want to ride my bike to the park. And read blogs like The Sartorialist. And spend my $ on things better than expensive rent. And listen to the Last Chance Harvey soundtrack, which makes me feel ridiculously mushy. And have a good job. In the Bay Area. And live 1.5 miles away from happily ever after. It will happen. Blogging has an odd ability to snap me out of (most) lowly moods. Xanga, how are you so cathartic? | | |
| a.) I'll be done with college by next Thursday.
b.) I want to work in research and development for a non-profit that does fucking amazing work for people. My dream is to bring in hella money for said fucking amazing org. Too bad no one has money, much less money to give away.
c.) The selfish in me wants to work in research and marketing for a big fat advertising company and make hella money. As bad as the economy may be, I really sadly believe an exploitative (is that a word?) industry that convinces people that very frivolous material things are wholly necessary will always be effective and profitable.
d.) My boyfriend is legitimately from northern California, geographically speaking. Hence, "hella" has found its way into my vocabulary, not really sorry.
e.) I believe that even cleaning restrooms is an honorable job if one continues to live their life honorably. So I guess I'll never actually go through with c.).
f.) I have small bursts of melancholic pensiveness about this whole "huge chapter of life closing" shit but if I try to dwell for more than 5 minutes, I start to feel numb. This inability to even attempt to more fully realize how big of a crazy fucking deal this all is then becomes redirected into half-assing a little bit of everything that really matters right now; the job search, resume revisions, papers, thank you letters. I think my denial is being enacted through my laziness and lack of accomplishing anything. As of now, I'm chalking it up to not feeling like it's actually all really over.
g.) Umm, real-time realization - my self-diagnosing is kind of creeping me out.
Stopping.
That's all right now. My paper has made minimal progress for the night.
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| I know this is a Facebook thing and though I've been tagged a ton on Facebook to do this, but I don't know man. I feel like if ever I reveal anything deeper about myself over the internet, this is the only outlet I'll ever use. I think I also find comfort knowing that those who may read and come across my blog can be counted on the fingers on my two hands. It also interesting that some of these 25 tidbits are things I've lifted from other blog entries. Sorry if you're a regular reader - I think it has become more like 22-23 things you probably didn't know about me.
1. I am the biggest procrastinator I know. It is not that uncommon for me to start a 6 page paper 3 hours before it is due. I have yet to suffer any real negative consequences academically, which is probably why I've been this way since coming to college.
2. I went to Korean school for 11 years of my life, every Saturday morning for 3 hours and I became pretty fluent. I've been in Santa Cruz (aka GRINGOLANDIA) for 3.5 years and now the rare times I go to the Korean market, the ladies who work there tell me to say things in English because a halfway mastered language is easier for them to understand than me trying to speak their native tongue.
3. Though I have become a NorCal lover, the food in SoCal absolutely OWNS any equivalent NorCal has to offer. Not sorry, because it's true.
4. When I was younger, my dad had a phase where his punishment for me whenever I did something bad was to re-translate English translated Korean folktales back into Korean. (I hope that makes sense.) It would take me hours and it was the cruelest punishment I would never think of. A few years ago, I saw those books in my parents' garage and I grabbed and dumped all of them into the return bin outside my hometown's public library.
5. One of my biggest pet peeves is getting lost while driving. U-turns seriously grind my gears.
6. I can eat a whole box of Girl Scout Samoa cookies in one sitting. I have never looked at the caloric count on the side of the box and I never will.
7. I grew up in a super conservative Protestant family. I was raised in a church that told me as a child I should sign an online petition to ban gay marriage in California. As impressionable as I was, I knew even then that such hypocrisy was the ANTITHESIS of what I believed in.
8. My first "kiss" was on the curve of my left ear.
9. In 7th-8th grades, I spent a lot of my free time reading over 60 works in the Classics section of the public library. Yes I was a big ass nerd.
10. Elf is my favorite movie of all time. I can quote extended lines of that movie and piss off/annoy my housemates every holiday season!
11. When I took piano lessons as a child, my instructor would give me a small carton of soy milk and when I tried to protest, she would say I was being rude. An honest child I was, so one time I had the brilliant idea to drink a lot of water before my lesson so I could honestly say I wasn't thirsty. Too bad she made me drink the soy milk anyway and I would just run out of the lesson without notice to PEE MY PANTS OFF. I hate soymilk.
12. My dream children: 2 dogs named Miso and Gnocchi and a cat named L'il Weezy.
13. I used to be a big music elitist - like Pitchforkmedia.com status snobbery. Now I don't care and will listen to anything from the Knux to Taylor Swift to contemporary gospel.
14. Big soup bowls and wide mugs for tea make me incredibly happy.
15. I have a dead serious obsession with all things cute. Fredflare.com has nothing on me. My dream job is to be the buyer for a company that sells ridiculously cute things.
16. Poker, chess, minesweeper, and sudoku all make me feel really dumb.
17. I was born in Flushing/Queens, New York but moved out to California when I was young on a cross-country road trip with my family. I have but one single memory of the trip; somewhere in New Mexico, my dad told me and my brother to feed a deer Cheeto balls so he could take pictures of us. My brother did, but I was too scared and just stood and cried.
18. The first time I met my friend Kera, we were like 5 and she yelled and threw sand at me and I was really scared of her. Then I met her again in high school and we became good friends and I told her what she did to me and she swears she doesn't remember. I can't make up such a traumatic chain of events, Kera.
19. When I was 6, I was sitting in the backyard with my brother and his friend. I farted and I totally blamed the dog. They bought it.
20. I hate drivers who get pissed off because they are being tailgated for driving so slow in the fast lane. Don't flip me off because you don't understand all the signs that say, "slower traffic keep right".
21. I am fascinated with food "porn".
22. You with the nasty mind - http://skinnygourmet.blogspot.com/2008/02/what-is-food-porn.html
23. I used to think I would always be satisfied just living my entire life in California, but now I am really wanting to live a period of my life in a different country.
24. I don't care about the love handles/novacaine ramifications - I eat candy almost every day.
25. Gandhi said, "I like your Christ. I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ." I agree - Jesus is groovy I have no doubt, but Christianity can make me very sad. | | |
| My mom decided to get pojangmacha with it for dinner tonight and made odeng and the spiciest ddukbokki of my life. It was so spicy my head hurt and my stomach burned for a while thereafter. Such a random ass dinner that probably gave me an ulcer.
I wish I had something much more insightful and witty to blog about than the current state of my stomach...
Well, I went to pick a lemon off my parents' tree the other day and while in the exhaustive search for the best out of the 3 lemons hanging from the tree, I stepped in a pile of my dog's shit.
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